Affection Given and Received
What are your husbando's love languages?
Top of the list is definitely humour.
His loved ones' laughter must be his most favourite sound in the world. He also really enjoys teasing people— and honestly he can be a real jerk sometimes!— so even if you're not laughing, any reaction at all should be enough for him.
More formally, though? Quality time and acts of service. I think he enjoys helping people just for the sake of it, just because it's the right thing to do. Having someone look after him in the same way would mean a lot to him.
The stereotypical advice, "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach," also applies. I will cook for him every single day and night!!!
Do you have pet names for each other?
Oh, yes, Sans loves nicknames and terms of endearment.
Thinking about him calling me by the diminutive of my real name... it makes my heart flutter like nothing else!! He would also cycle through dozens of sweet, schmoozy pet names just because he knows I love them. My favourites are the canonical "kid" and "kiddo," but I am also partial to the more affectionate "baby," and anything with a possessive pronoun in front. It's an easy way to make me feel loved, so even though he might feel a bit embarrassed at first, he's more than happy to oblige.
I have names I like to call him, too... but they're secret!
What are some things you love about him?
There's so much to pick from, I don't know where to start!!!
If I had to pick one thing to be the coolest/hottest/sexiest thing about him, it'd be how perceptive he is. At times it borders on mind-reading and I have a thing for (pseudo)telepaths. The idea that he would be sensitive to even the most minute details in my behaviour/our relationship, that I could be the focus of such careful attention.... Ah, it makes my heart beat fast! Even better that it seems totally effortless on his part. He wouldn't have to work hard at all. He could read me like a sensory book for babies.
Awareness/observation (both of others and of the self) are among my most important life values. It's frustrating for me to live in a world where most people are oblivious and disengaged, so this not only sets him apart from the crowd, but makes him a very attractive partner for me.
Next: I love his silly, cute, stupid perma-grin. "Always smiling" and "dissonant serenity" are some of my favourite character tropes, both of which he fits to a tee. In real life, I very much admire people who are in control of their emotions, who express them purposely and with specific intent. Sans strikes me as a calculating sort of guy who says exactly what he means to and doesn't let much of anything slip.As sexy as I find that level of self-control, I'm also very intrigued by his loss of control: what it takes to crack his facade, to catch him off guard and make him really lose his shit. As evidenced by my fantasies of perpetrating countless horrific acts specifically to draw out that sort of reaction... Well, it's safe to say that I'd "kill" to be the one who has that much influence over him. Ugh, he is so hot when he's mad! Still, it'd be nice to see that ruthless side of him under more hospitable circumstances. Maybe if I asked nicely...
What are some things he loves about you?
Hmm… it’s hard to say.
I spent so long feeling convinced that Sans could never love me, so our relationship is not really based on mutual attraction. I just imagined Sans being kind and affectionate with me without trying to rationalise or understand it, because if I thought about it too hard, I would start to think that he doesn't like me and that I’m unlovable… Very sad!
This time, I’ll try to answer from a healthier perspective. What does Sans love about me…? He loves my soft heart… I’m so sensitive, and I express my emotions so freely, that he’s almost in awe. He keeps everything bottled up tight, he cant imagine living like I do… but he can also see that I’m gentle and careful, and great at getting people to talk. If he's gonna open up to anyone, then it might as well be me.
He loves my silly sense of humour, my creativity, and energy. I’m tired a lot, but when I can muster the strength, I’m quite playful and fun to be around. He loves me for my optimistic outlook, for my perseverance and resilience, and my introspective nature. He's impressed by my ability to articulate my thoughts and feelings, which makes it so much easier for him to support me through the ups and downs of my life. And I'm sure there are even more things he would love about me that I'm not aware of and won't be able to see in myself...
What would you write to him in a love letter?
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How might you try to fluster him?
This guy is impossible to ruffle. What is the word... ineffable?? Basically, I’d have to try really hard, but Im willing to put in the effort.
Sans seems to be weak to unfunny jokes, so I’d start by poking fun at my own advances. Like grabbing his hand while making a silly joke. Maybe I'd say I’m some kind of inspector, I need to check the density of his metacarpals, and use that as an excuse to squeeze him and hold him tight. Of course, Sans is way funnier than me, so he’s guaranteed to respond with an even better joke— one which I'm unlikely to withstand/recover from, because I’m weak to all forms of affection. If flirtations are hits, then he’s easily able to tank them, meanwhile I am an underleveled noob provoking the area boss in a dangerous zone.
To genuinely fluster him, I’d have to suddenly and totally overwhelm him. He’d need to have his emotional defenses whittled down in advance, and to believe he is in complete control of the situation right up to the moment of surprise. (Yes, I am referencing circumstances from his boss battle and moment of death.) That said, I'm not sure what exactly this would entail... I gotta grind and level up my flirtation points...
What might prompt him to suddenly show you affection?
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Does he express his love more with words or with actions?
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Quality Time Spent Together
Do you share any hobbies/interests?
Hmm... yes, I think we have a lot in common!
Sans "loves science fiction, especially when it's real;" he's a comedian by trade who specialises in practical jokes; he plays the trombone (I just know he can do more than the sad "wah wah wahhh" sound effect); he reads car magazines; he has his own telescope to indulge his interest in astronomy; he enjoys talking to people, eating greasy food, sneaking around places he shouldn't, and chillaxing.
Considering his canonical interests... I also like science (fictional or otherwise); I play the ukulele, another "meme-tier" instrument (though I never learned any funny sound effects); I appreciate a good joke when I hear one; I like looking at the stars; all food tastes the same to me, so I'm not picky in the slightest; and all I do is relax.
Going into headcanon territory, now: we'd share a love for rhythm games, though he'd prefer ones like Guitar Hero, while I play exclusively on my mobile phone. And I think Sans would be super into urban exploration/recreational trespassing just for the thrill of it. I've never tried anything like that, but I know I'd have fun with him no matter where we went.
I also want to just relax and listen to music with him, anything from rock songs to smooth jazz. I can't see him having any strong opinions about my silly vocal synthesiser music, but he'd enjoy hearing me sing along to them.
What would he think about your hobbies/interests?
In short, he'd find them really endearing, and he would encourage me to open up and talk about them at length.
I always draw Goki talking Sans's ear off, but that's not at all how I am in real life. I'm more of a listener than anything, and I'm often hesitant to share myself with others. Part of the fantasy of Sans is that he would be just as good a listener as I am, and he would know exactly how to poke and prod me to get me talking.
He'd find it hilarious how obsessively I draw and write about him, and be confused by the strength of my devotion but (secretly) flattered all the same. Of course he cherishes every piece of art I give him— he hangs them on the fridge, keeps them in his wallet, on his bedside table, on the dashboard of his car...
Also, I think he'd find my sticker collecting/digitising/sharing hobby to be absolutely adorable, because— objectively?? It is! I don't actually think that "incidentally diminutive and intentionally babyish" is his type at all, but it'd certainly create a nice contrast. He gets to be an understatedly cool guy with a cute, little girl hanging off his arm.
What else? He might ask me once or twice, out of sheer curiousity, to give him a tarot reading. Still, I don't think he'd believe in random divination, since he relies a lot on his observations and intuition to make sense of the world. And he's definitely not interested in predetermined fates, despite being a bit fatalistic himself, since he cares so much about choices. It helps that I don't use tarot to predict the future, but rather as a tool for self-reflection.
Speaking of, my interest in self-help/introspection/continual improvement would make him very, very proud. He'd praise me a lot whenever I tried something new, went out of my comfort zone, or showed any progress at all. Hell, I think he'd praise me every single day just for making it through another 24 hours. That's the sort of thing I desperately need, and he'd be overjoyed to be the one to give it to me.
Most importantly, I think he would regularly read my website. He'd truly appreciate learning about me from a different perspective, and enjoy my unique writing style, too. I can imagine us sitting across the room from each other when his email pings, and he'd go "sweet, new Vivarism update just dropped." And he would tease me about whatever it is I wrote, talking as if he doesn't know me personally, and I'd blush and quip back but be so, so, so happy that he cared enough to look closely at this project of mine that I work so hard on.
Do you think you might pick up each other's hobbies/interests?
Not really, but here are Sans's favourite pixels from my collection:
Where would you go on a date?
The easiest answer is out to eat.
We would fake marriage proposals to try and get free food. I don't know that he would ever really marry me— it's something I want very badly yet struggle to believe I deserve, and Sans doesn't seem like the kind of guy who would care either way. For now, the idea that we could team up to do this for a scam/joke is plenty enough for me.
Other than that: the beach, karaoke, an arcade. A nighttime drive to have a picnic on a hilltop under the stars. Every day is a lazy date at home, too— Sans is the king of Netflix and chill. I think it'd be funny if we purposely watched aggressively unsexy shows, like My Strange Addiction or Monsters Inside Me. Actually that last one is perfect, OMG. I know it's about rare/scary parasites but he would make the most mood-killing pun every single time it came on and then we would do it anyway so I'd get Pavlov'd into finding it attractive/hilarious. The running theme of our relationship is that I can never, ever win against him. Luckily I'm very pleased with my place in the status quo!
How often do you make time just for him?
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What is something new you could learn together?
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What conversations would you most like to have with him?
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Physicality and Touch
Aghghg it might be too embarrassing to talk about kisses and cuddles... BUT I WANNA!!!!!
What would it feel like to hug your husbando?
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What's it like holding hands?
Depends. Is he wearing gloves?
I am not a monsterfucker so I’m actually a little frightened by Sans’s physique— it’s taken time, but I warm up to him a little more each day. Right now, I think I would be scared to hold his hand with the bare bones against my skin...
Maybe I'd be okay though? I want to remind myself that it's not as creepy as an actual human skeleton— he’s a monster so he’s built different. Right, his bones are thicker and more substantial, and I think they'd have a soft texture, like this Sylvanian Families seal.
But still, gloves are hot! I love gloves, so naturally I'd prefer them! Part of the fun is poking inside the glove, too, like wiggling my finger past the elastic around his wrist and onto his palm. Sans and I can start with that to help me feel less afraid.
In my imagination, I am always much, mush smaller than him, so it’s a bit less like holding hands and more like holding a few of his fingers. When he takes me by the hand, I’m totally wrapped up, enveloped in his palm. He can hold onto my wrist the way you'd hold a pencil, heh…
How does he like to be kissed?
Skeletons can't kiss because they don't have lips...
... but that's not stopping either of us.
What do you appreciate about his appearance?
I love his smile most of all!
I love how expressive he is with his eyes. I love how versatile his design is, so artists can draw him looking cool, cute, or scary, and everything in between. I love his casual way of dressing… his socks... ahh… I’m warming up more and more to his bones, too. I like the look of his ribs and his spine, and I admit a peek of his clavicle and/or sternum through the neck of his T-shirt turns me on a bit. I just love him. I hesitate to call him beautiful, but that’s what he is, isn't he? Just marvelous …
How would he feel about PDA?
Eh, he's indifferent about it.
He doesn't really care what others think of him, so he has no need for posturing like, “I got a girl and you dont,” or anything like that. Not like I'm a brag-worthy gf anyways. Still, he doesn't think twice about holding hands and kissing in public, and he'd let me sit in his lap, no problem. But Sans is a relatively private person, so he wouldn't want to let anyone see our more intimate or tender moments, or at least he wouldn't be talking about them to others in casual conversation.
On the other hand, I have seen convincng portrayals of Sans as an exhibitionist... I dunno. Just something to think about.
What textures do you associate with him?
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Best position for cuddling your husbando?
Laying directly on top of him is the best!
That way, he can wrap his arms around me and cuddle me like a teddy bear, maybe stroke my hair or my neck while he's at it. I know he's bones but I like to pretend he's super soft and snuggly and makes for a comfy pillow/mattress.
I also really like spooning with him as the big spoon. That's how my cuddle simulator is set up, and how I tend to imagine him holding me even when I'm out of bed and doing something else. Like that, he can talk right into my ear, pet my tummy, squeeze me close and let me know I'm safe. He can have fun squishing into my hair, letting my curls poke into his eye sockets and nose hole, LMAO... Ahhh... it sounds so comfy, I nearly fell asleep just thinking about it.
Where would he most like to touch you?
My headcanon is that Sans is fascinated by humans— flesh, skin, hair— I'm soft all over and he can't get enough. He'd want to pet me, hold me tight, lick me, etc.
I think his favourite part would be my hair. It's very fluffy, thick and wild. I tend to shed, also, and sometimes the loose hair collects itself on a knot that hangs onto the ends of my afro like a little fluff ball. Sans would make a game out of pulling out the knot without me noticing.
He'd want to play with it more normally, too, running his hands through it or twirling it around his finger. My scalp is really sensitive, so he'd be as gentle as he could, careful not to pull or snag anything. Over time, I'd trust him to help me comb and wash it, maybe even teach him to braid it, too. He helps Papyrus out with making costumes and silly videos and things, so I feel like he would spare some time to help me out...
Relationship Development
Have you thought about where you might meet?
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Who initiates the romance? How does it start?
On top of being extremely forward and affectionate, I am also terrible at keeping secrets. The moment I got a crush on him, I'd tell him straight away and, well, he'd just have to figure out what to do about that.
The problem is that I struggle to see Sans reciprocating my feelings in any meaningful way. These early stages are difficult for me to parse.... I guess Sans would agree to go out with me, "just to see how it shakes out," without any long-term expectations.
How do you imagine him being during the start of your relationship?
He would keep things very, very casual at first, emotionally holding me at arm's length so he doesn't get hurt.
Because I'm so head-over-heels in love with him, so immediately affectionate, and so straight-forward in saying "I like you," he'd be (rightfully) even more wary that the relationship is doomed to fail. I think he'd focus on having a good time together, sharing lots of laughs and cute moments. He'd just want to enjoy my attention while it lasted. Honestly, he'd probably be subtly shit-testing me the entire time to check if my feelings were really that strong, to figure out if I loved him or just the idea of him.
But I have such a magnetic presence, and I'm so disarming, so easy to talk to, that he would find himself seizing little chances to open up to me. No serious displays of emotion or unintentionally candid admissions, but... just little things, here and there, about how he really feels and what he really thinks. Sans doesn't seem to be outright dishonest— he's more of a "lie by omission," "avoid the topic" sort of guy. So, around me, he'd find himself omitting less and less, and he'd feel nervous about that, but also kinda excited.
What would change as your relationship develops?
Once Sans finally says, "ok, this is good, this is fine. I can have this. Even if I lose it all, even if it gets taken away from me in the end, this is worth trying for," then our real romance can begin.
I already can't hide anything from him (see: perceptiveness ♥) so, by this point, he's already learnt plenty about me. Now it's my turn to start hearing about his hopes and dreams and worries and fears, witnessing his emotions as they happen— not just his poker face. It's scary for him, but he's relieved when, again and again, I respond positively. I'd show him that I love him no matter what, and that I'm always doing my best to be on his side.
Having him accept, reciprocate, and actively desire my love would do wonders for my self-esteem, too. It's very painful to be in a one-sided romance. Once he started to really get close to me, I'd feel as though all my efforts were paying off. We'd become closer than ever!
In which ways are you compatible?
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How might outsiders react to your relationship?
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When does he realise he loves you?
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What would he risk by being with you?
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What are your biggest obstacles to overcome?
Because my low opinion of myself makes me think I will cause all the problems in our relationship, my immediate thought is: "I'm too needy and Sans wouldn't like that."
In love, I am extremely clingy. I can't relax unless he commits to me and shows me regular affection and attention, which might be too much to ask of him. In fact, the thing that held me back from committing to Sans was the fear that he could never love me enough to behave that way for me.
The obvious solution was to imagine a version of him who somehow sees something good about me, enjoys my company, and naturally treats me the way I want to be treated— because he likes it, too!
Commitment is still our biggest issue though. Assuming Sans is capable of giving me the love I need, he would still hesitate to go all-in on our relationship. As friendly as he is, he seems to have a preoccupation with being separated from his loved ones. He may hold me at a distance to keep himself emotionally safe, only opening up with time as he gently comes around to the idea that, yeah... this is permanent after all.
Character Growth
What benefit would you add to your husbando's life?
I'd be his number one cheerleader and supporter!
Laugh at all his jokes, pack a lunch for all his jobs, give him lots of attention, show him undying affection and admiration.... Basically, I'd be a soft spot to land after a hard day. I'm really optimistic too, and super big on reclaiming agency and responsibility for your own life. I think I could inspire him to hope again— or, if we meet after the True Pacifist ending, bolster the hope he gained from his relationship with the Anomaly.
How has loving your husbando changed you for the better?
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Which qualities of his would you like to emulate?
Oh, so many things... I admire him a lot.
Sans seems to choose his words carefully. He's very deliberate in what he says and does, and I really admire that amount of self control.
How would you support each other in reaching your goals?
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